Do you doubt yourself a lot? I know I do. I tell myself a lot of excuses, such as “I’m not good enough” and “I’ll do it tomorrow” (it’s funny how “tomorrow ” never actually comes).
And it hurts. A lot.
But we must learn to silence that voice, because it’s simply a bunch of gibberish. Maybe you fear the truth: you are good enough, and you have what it takes to succeed. This puts the ball in your court. It gives you responsibility to choose your response and live life on your own terms. Now that’s scary.
Then there are times when you do believe in yourself and get your most important work done. Nothing can stop you from living the life of your dreams. You show up and do the work.
What makes the difference? That’s what this lesson is all about.
Treat Your Mind Like a Radio Station
We all carry different tapes.
These tapes demand our attention and require a response. They say all sorts of mean things, and they cut deep – these are messages we’ve heard since our childhood. Here’s the most poisonous tape running in our heads. To show you how powerful it is, I ask you to fill in the blank:
“I’m not ____ enough.”
Unless you’re living under a rock, it’s not difficult to fill in the blank. You do it without too much thought. The response comes automatically, with little or no awareness what it’s doing to you and your self-esteem.
Do any of these responses sound familiar?
- I’m not thin enough.
- I’m not smart enough.
- I’m not sexy enough.
- I’m not manly/girly enough.
Unfortunately, you can probably relate to these tapes. But where do they come from?
We don’t have to go far to find the source. Just pick up any magazine, or check any web page, and you’ll see these tapes in action. Media companies bombard you with these messages because advertisers pay them for it. Self-doubt is a multi-billion dollar business. Companies want you to feel insecure, so you will buy their product.
It’s sad, but true.
So, how can you protect yourself against these harmful messages?
Well, you’re in luck, because you have the power to switch the tape. Just like you can change the radio channel when the ads are on, you can also decide to silence the “not enough” tape.
It’s not easy, but it is possible.
Your mind is a powerful machine. It broadcasts daily and can accomplish some pretty amazing things. It’s also very persuasive. It knows our flaws and most intimate thoughts. But it’s busy. It makes mistakes and it’s not perfect (and neither are you). And now, we can use that to our advantage.
What’s Your Party Song?
When you keep a small promise, you deposit valuable points into your emotional bank account.
But sometimes that’s not enough to silence the nagging thoughts of the inner critic. You need something more to combat the walking, talking Hollywood Wall of Shame. I call this your party song.
Everyone has one. Mine is “Can’t Stop Me Now” by Queen. There is something about that song, which makes me drop everything and get up on the dance floor. What song gets you up on the dance floor?
Everyone is dancing to a different tune. Your thoughts are your show tunes. They play a huge role in how (and if) you act. Imagine you’re at a party. You’re waiting by the sidelines, eagerly awaiting for the next song to play. You’re secretly hoping the DJ will play your party song.
Think of it this way: the dance floor is where it’s at. This is where people come together and celebrate life. Here’s one very important rule: everyone is welcome up on the dance floor. This is not high school; this is life, and in life, everyone loves someone who’s finding her beat and giving it all her got. You’re doing what you were meant to do all along.
Yes, it’s difficult. Yes, it gets a bit awkward at times. But this is my best advice on how to convince yourself that you’re good enough – you get up and you dance. You choose the tune, and you go bananas. Sounds scary? That’s because it is. But have you considered the alternative?
The Show Must Go On
A good show tune makes you feel alive. It makes you appreciate life, you become more hopeful, and determined to give it your all. Your troubles melt like lemon drops and nothing can stop you now.
Here are some popular show tunes:
- U2: “One”
- Queen: “Bohemian Rhapsody”
- John Lennon: “Imagine”
- Aretha Franklin: “I Say a Little Prayer for You”
- Michael Jackson: “Beat It”
- Foo Fighters: “Times Like These”
(For a list of great songs, check out this page).
Music changes our mood, feelings and thoughts. It can send shivers down our spine and it brings people together. I always admire people who have suffered loss, heartache, and beat the odds and overcome their adversity. They looked into their own hearts, listened to their soundtrack, and kept dancing to the tune. I don’t think we choose our show tunes; the show tunes choose us. All we got to do is listen.
Are you listening? The show must go on.
Treating your mind like a radio station and finding your party song is one of the most effective ways to overcome self-doubt.
It’s rare for people to listen inside their hearts and get up on the dance floor. Too many people watch by the sidelines and let their whole lives pass them by. But that’s not going to be you, because you don’t want to have any regrets on your deathbed now, do you?
Lesson #4 is going to bust the popular myth about raw “talent” and show you what it really takes to get up on the dance floor and bust your moves. Hint: you’re going to need to put on a bigger show.
All the best,
Your tour guide
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